March 2014 - March 2015

365 days can hold a lot of changes! I'd better hurry up and write a blog post before the forgetful hormone totally kicks in! My last triathlon race was exactly a year ago...and about a month after it, I had come to grips with it being the indefinite end of competition...although my heart catching up to my brain took a bit longer. The end of a dream was really sad, especially when it didn't pan out the way I'd hoped and thought was realistic. Ahh, life. At the end of the day, I knew that "...the Lord works everything for good for those who love Him. Romans 8:28" ...and if I understood everything, that would seriously minimize an all-powerful God.

April 15, 2014

This was my 33rd birthday. It was also the day after I found out from a foot doctor that my MRI showed results interpreted that it would take about a year to fully recover from the injury - and that's if I was obsessively rehabbing. When I considered that I had already been obsessively rehabbing, and it wasn't getting better, this was not news I had hoped for...Not a great birthday present! In my family we always joke about the random statistic that when you're 33, it's (supposedly) the happiest year of your life...I think I laughed through a tearful statement that my 33rd year was starting off pretty rotten! So much to be thankful for, though, in the 2007 - 2014 stretch of competing in triathlons...I didn't want to lock the door and throw away the key, but definitely move on...
Whenever a girl goes through a major life transition, it's always a good idea to get a haircut! :) I wanted to try a really short 'do, but never had the guts...and always liked and felt the need to have a pony tail option for running...but that wasn't necessary any more. Some day maybe I will try highlighting or coloring my hair...but I left that for the next life transition ;)

chop chop (with Tessa's bootie in the pic too)

this is what I would look like if made into a cartoon...or...short hair bedhead

Mid May 2014

I got pregnant! What a gift!!! And what a shock that I got pregnant that quickly.

Pregnancy: The Good

There are some perks to being pregnant:

1. Double the blood flow. This is probably the reason (in addition to time off and resting) why my body healed faster than normal.

2. Related to #1...Better circulation, so it was the first time my feet and hands were warm in the winter!

3. My nails were stronger.
4. Feeling Jillyn kick was the sweetest feeling...

5. Twice I parked in the special "Expecting mothers" parking space...yay.

I wasn't someone who loved being pregnant...But, so very thankful that I was pregnant!

Pregnancy: The (not so?) Bad & Ugly

Week 8 I was dragged to the life-sucking machine on The Princess Bride, and it was cranked up to the max. I felt horrible and remember a close relationship to the couch. I never threw up, but had some serious nausea....I think the hard part is always uncertainty...many told me that it would go away after I got to the second trimester....so weeks 13 - 23 were especially hard since I kept thinking that the next day, I might feel better...it just kept dragging on.
The bright spot and turning point was when I felt her kick during week 18! It made me cry all morning. What an amazing miracle. 2 cells to a bubbly kick in my belly?! Incredible.

almost 18 weeks, a few days before I felt her kick:) 

At 19 weeks we found out the gender...We loved the fact that we get to find out if it's a little girl or a little boy, and see that little munchkin! It went from talking about "it" to talking about Jillyn Sue! And praying for her by name, and talking to her, & about her! A boy first seemed normal to both of us, just with our own family orders...but when we found out that she was a little girl, it was like I realized that I wanted a girl! haha. I'm so glad we don't get to choose! I'm glad I got to transition my constant sense of wonder into knowing it was a little girl. When she was born, there were so many other surprises and things to enjoy other than her gender! ha.

We didn't realize we'd see her in 3D, so it was an extra fun surprise for us in addition to finding out her gender. We knew that we were her parents because we thought this pic was completely adorable!! haha. I made a pavlova dessert and we took it to Spemilies' house to reveal the surprise gender and share her name, but it kind of all melted together and was hard to see the strawberries at the bottom, signifying a girl. Ha! Oh well, mission accomplished even if it wasn't perfect:)
Tessa was getting even more clingy than normal...

Although pregnancy wasn't a totally feel-good experience for me, I never threw up. I despise throwing up - but who likes the jaw-watering, nauseous feeling?! And I've heard that it doesn't even make you feel better after you throw up (unlike if you have food poisoning or a virus...), so...I guess feeling rotten on the couch was a step up from feeling rotten next to the toilet! (It can alllllways be worse!!!)

Perk of Having More Time: Art!

I was able to do some art work...I've always liked art, and wished art classes in school were longer and also wished that there were more of them! I sort of wanted to major in graphic design when I was in college, but some of the classes were twice as long, and right smack in the middle of swim practice, so I decided to go the logistics route (I wanted to swim for Tennessee, and besides, it was paying for my education!).

I have taken only a few classes in high school, so I think abstract art is what's best for me right now (seems like there are less rules and critiques on what is a "good" piece of artwork). I made a few pieces for my little nieces and nephew...and a couple for Jillyn...it was so much fun!

for Andrew

for Kaitlyn

for Aimee

for Mabry...still needs a verse:)

Sunrise for Jillyn

for Jillyn...still needs a verse:)

29.5 weeks was my first baby shower. This was special because it was at my parents' house, and so many sweet friends were there...some I had known since birth and others were new friends, and many in between. Stephen's mom was able to come all the way from MO, which was also special, along with his aunt and cousins. My mom and Emily put it together, and Kathy also helped get things ready before the shower while I was in bed resting. My favorite part of both showers was when we prayed for little Jillyn Sue...(and for Stephen and me as parents!)...that she would know and follow Jesus with all her heart...the sweetest, best prayer! My heart was so full!! Here's a pic of many who were there...some had to leave early...my face is teary after such sweet prayers!

Christmas Day was 34 weeks!

Jillyn's first Christmas:)

Every appointment after week 34 showed that Jillyn measured the same 32cm...the doctors kept saying it wasn't a big deal, because she could be in a different position...I'd been feeling "little zingers" as the doc described them of just feeling like she was moving down, so it wasn't a huge shock that my belly didn't continue getting bigger. Boy did I feel big though!! Another valid reason I kept the same measurement was because Christmas night, I came down with the stomach bug, and was in my bed for 36 hours straight (unless I was on the toilet or puking in the trash can)...it was horrible! I have never felt so horrible in my life. Dry heaving and 34 weeks pregnant is seriously rotten. I told Jillyn that if she decided to come during that time, she would kill her mommy! I really couldn't get out of bed, and was so thirsty, but couldn't keep it down. Finally after 12 hours of puking and dry heaving, I could sip a little water and later had a popsicle. Oh, man! My mom stayed with me in Townsend and kept me hydrated and alive. Here is a pic of the rainbow in the sky when she drove me home 2 days later:)

36.5 weeks was my other baby shower, thrown by Joy, Katie, Kim, and Rachel. What a sweet, fun, delicious day! Again, we prayed for little Jillyn and laughed and smiled all afternoon! My heart was exploding - I felt so loved and am so thankful for such sweet friends that God has given me!

Sweet hostesses - we'll have had 5 babies in 5 months!!

Not everyone was in the pic, but here are many who came:)

37 weeks and 5 days, my water broke at 11pm. We were in Townsend making sure our new phones work there...In hindsight, I realize my body had been prepping a bit, but nothing too crazy to tell me I would have her the next day! I went on a jog with Stephen and we had a sweet date at a delish Mexican restaurant in Townsend.

I heard a pop when my water broke! And it leaked quite a bit, but kept leaking for the next hour or so.
Dr. Eaton was on call when we arrived, and was there until 8am. She checked and verified that my water broke. She also told me that I was GBS positive and because of that, she wanted to start inducing me sooner than later. I was having very light contractions, but not making progress yet. Around 2am, she started me at level 2 pitocin.

My mom arrived around 1am and brought soothing Christian music that helped me all night. The music was so sweet to focus on and hum. 

my fav pic from the hospital:)

The uncertainty was what was the hardest. Within a couple hours, they put the pitocin to 4, then 6. At 6, I was having some serious contractions! Pitocin was a b-e-a-s-t. Okay, actually I have heard it is a beast. I don't have anything to compare it to. I thought I might pass out from pain...which honestly could just be labor, but people tell me that pitocin revs up the pain train more than without it. The pain was intense, but the uncertainty behind the pain was the worst... I remember being at 3cm at 9:45am, and asking Dr. Shirk when he thought she would arrive. At this point, I was having intense contractions that lasted 2 minutes (!!) and occurred every 2 minutes. There was a clock on the wall in front of my bed and I remember looking at it....and then having 3 intense contractions, and then looking at it again and it was barely over 5 minutes later! ...I couldn't believe I was only 3cm still... I really wanted to have Jillyn naturally, but I was getting worried that I wouldn't be able to push her out if I kept this 2min/2min schedule up much longer. I asked the Dr. and nurse what time they thought she'd come, and he guessed maybe around 3p...At that point, I was really worried. I knew that in the transition phase, it was typical to think that I couldn't do it...but I was 3cm, which was far from transition!!! How could I do that for 6 more hours and then think that I couldn't do it?!?!

my two amazing helpers all night!

Nurse Lindsay was amazing! She knew I didn't want any anesthetic, and told me that based on how I had acted until that point, I could do it. It was one thing to hear that I could do it from Stephen and my mom, but to me, the nurse carried much more weight in this situation!! ha. She sees births every day, and I felt like I believed her more than anyone else in the world in that moment. The next check about 40ish minutes later, I was five cm, and then right after that, I felt like I had to push - I couldn't not push (sorry for the double negative, but it describes it better!)...And then I pushed 10 minutes and she was born at 10:44am! All that time I was most concerned about transition and pushing, and those were the easiest for me. The hardest hours were 2am - 10:30am...pushing was the easy part since I felt her moving down, making her entrance...I knew she was so close, and I was so close to holding her! She came so fast that the doctor missed her, which was not a big deal. Nurse Lindsay was my coach, and Stephen and my mom each had one leg. I knew it was special when I looked at Stephen and my mom in between pushes and they were both teary and almost crying! Babies are truly miracles! Going from 2 cells to a precious little baby is beyond this world, a work of the Lord Most High. It is just amazing. I never want to forget those sweet moments before and after she was born. Wow....and at 37 and 6 days, our precious little girl was born!

I wondered if I would be loud, like in movies or TV shows, or even watching births on the internet...it seemed like women screamed or moaned loudly or deeply. I never screamed or made lots of deep moaning sounds - who has the energy for that?! Giving birth was so hard! I was just trying to focus on relaxing, breathing in steadily, and exhaling. When I exhaled, I often softly moaned, but I didn't have the breath to push out lots of crazy loud energy. I knew I needed to conserve everything for the end! Another myth-buster was that I never lost modesty...I mean, sure, do what ya gotta do to get that sweet baby out, but there was never a point that I didn't care.

Stephen and I took Bradley Method classes for 3 months of Monday nights...our last class was the night before my water broke! How nice of Jillyn to wait until we were finished! ;) We really enjoyed the classes and learned a lot and met new friends - I would recommend it:)

I hope I don't have to get induced for #2! I remember thinking that Jillyn was going to be an only child. Haha! 

Dad visited during labor and then of course after she was born....so sweet:)

Emily came with lunch - yay! (and with Andrew, Kaitlyn, and Aimee, but they were banned because of the flu outbreak (all kids under 12)). Spencer also visited and met little Jillyn Sue. Sweet to have fam so close and able to be there and visit.
Stephen spent both nights with me...after the first night, he went downstairs to tell his coworkers the news:) and that he wouldn't be coming to work for a bit.

She was itty bitty, 6# 2oz. And such a sweet little snuggler from the start. 

itty bitty lovins!

I was scheduled to have an appointment with Dr. Shirk at 1:45 that day, so we all laughed that I wouldn't make it...and he said he'd tell them not to call me to tell me I was late...ha.

Hard parts in the recovery room: she latched on great, would suck three times, and then fall asleep. Sweet baby was soooo tired! It'd been a long night! They kept checking her glucose levels since she dropped to 43...and to leave the hospital, she had to be at least 45! The lactation consultant kept coming to help me, but she just wasn't interested, and then would start screaming. It was sad and broke my heart! They had to keep pricking her little heel to check the glucose level...uuugh.

The next Monday, we had an appointment with our pediatrician, and he said not to worry about her first couple days - most babies don't come out knowing they need to eat...they've never eaten before! He was so great at reassuring us, and said she needed to lose weight first to know that she was hungry, and then she'd be just fine. He was right, and she has been a nursing all-star since day 3. Watching her eat is so adorable.

snuggles with daddy:)

The first month was h-a-r-d. Wow, starting off the birth experience with no sleep (we arrived at the hospital a little before midnight) is not recommended!!! I felt like I was in the twilight zone for the first month. 

Jillyn loooves to snuggle. When we first put her in her crib, she acted like we had abandoned her on an island. Figuring out what made her happy was hard in the first month...but the second has been a lot easier, and she even seems to be in her own little groove and schedule. She loves to be walked around the kitchen island...probably because I jogged a lot during the time she was in the womb. Another thing she is pretty obsessed about is a black/white picture. There are a lot of printouts that she loves staring at.
I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have survived the first month without her swing! Even now when she is over 2 months, she still loves it although sleeps most of the time in her crib.

love the pic of Jesus in the background - the perfect example of Love:)

love her!!

Family and friends have been incredibly helpful and have blessed us with many gifts and words of encouragement! We are so thankful and praise God for giving us such a sweet blessing from Him! Thaaaaanks!!! I feel like I've only blinked a couple times, and she's already over 2 months old!
XO's,
bethany